Gay Geezer Getting Up After a Big Bad Fall

IT WAS GOOD

I am not worried about how these entries are written since no one is reading my blog, so it’s a diary. MT was over Friday. A quiet voice, so quiet that my lousy hearing made me ask him to repeat too many times. We talked about religion, of course. I don’t understand what the point of one’s religion is if there’s no magical thinking. A good Episcopalian, he said he had no idea what would happen after he died and a few other theological tchotchkes he wasn’t so sure about either. What about those streets paved with gold and all that other cool stuff? I kind of sort of envy my sister and her husband with their fundamentals. My sister has had such a shitty life. She has had to have a tight, constricting belief system to survive. LS came over Saturday with a luscious pizza. He stayed with me much of the afternoon. He got me down the scary garage stairs, and I walked in the sun. Thank you so much, sweet sweet man. So kind to others. God, please let me have good boundaries and never ask him for too much. Sunday, C & J, then B, and then phone convo with D. C & J always look so glamorous. They brought along their dog, who is clearly a deity. I tried, not very successfully, to engage J in the conversation. It is annoying to him when C and I talk about academialand. B, such a scared little girl. She reminds me of myself, which is probably why I was not always nice to her in the past. I am trying to make up for it now. I was an empathetic listener! Yay! And D. I like him. And wow, he is so totally into himself ! I don’t think he ever hears what I am saying. I have learned (finally) that with some people it’s enough just to listen, and not to formulate in my mind the next thing I will say. Gratitude yes Gratitude